A high-achieving empathetic man’s guide to self confidence
Self-confidence can seem so elusive for us at times in our lives, believing it’s somewhere out there, when really, it’s within us whenever we want it.
As an empathetic man, it’s easy for us to get lost in our heads overthinking, become overwhelmed by heavy emotions and face savage self-doubt / anxiety, leading us to fall back to old patterns of shutting down, isolating, staying small and hiding ourselves.
Here are 3 ways to access it immediately:
Clear the shame
What’s stopping you from feeling confidence is most likely the shame you’re not dealing with, letting it dictate how you feel and your actions. Shame actually makes us more self-absorbed and used as a way of distracting ourselves from taking responsibility and action. We can clear shame by expressing the shame we carry in witness of another safe person so we feel that we no longer have to hide anything. Alternatively, is to be with the heaviness in your body through meditation, and then allow that heaviness to be processed through breathwork, breathing in and out of the mouth will help you release it.
Activity: Try 30 breaths in and out of the mouth with a short pause at the end of the round, by holding the breath for 30 seconds and then repeat x 2 rounds.
Collect the wins
I’m tipping if you’re reading this, you’re a type of person who is incredibly hard on himself, join the club! You’ve probably already done some pretty awesome things in your life that you’ve probably failed to acknowledge, so it’s time to draw on them. Look at what you’ve overcome in the past, and what you continue to overcome now to give you evidence that you can handle ANYTHING that comes your way. Collect the wins, and collect the confidence.
Find a reason bigger than yourself
If you’re wanting to build confidence, there’s most likely something you want to achieve, do, give or experience. As chronic overthinkers we have a tendency to worry about our perception we portray to others, we honestly make many things about ourselves, if you’re really truthful with yourself. This can actually block confidence, because we focus more on what our actions mean about us, rather than something bigger. E.g. Posting your wisdom on social media worried about judgement of others, rather than the message that may help someone. Next time you want to take big action, shift your focus to the purpose rather than the action itself, and watch your moments of courage turn into embodied confidence.
Confidence has always been within you and is available at anytime, sometimes you just need to clear what’s in the way, witness your already inherent value and ability, then work towards a bigger purpose than yourself.
If you’re a high achieving empathetic men looking to build your self-confidence, who’s wanting to burst of yourself with energy, take lead of your life and relationships, alongside other high achieving leaders, the Ascension Community is open for new members: Learn more here